mental health


Question by  trilliank (29)

What can be done about a commitment phobia?

My boyfriend has a commitment phobia and I want to know whether he can get over if or if I should leave him.


Answer by  yourfriend (36)

If your boyfriend is that afraid of being with you, maybe it's not your fault. He may just be too immature to handle an adult relationship. Please don't beat yourself up. It doesn't mean you're not pretty or witty enough. It could just be his own personality that he might never outgrow. Follow your heart.


Answer by  BeenThereDoneThat (33)

There is no medical cure for commitment phobia. Some people are just afraid of commitment. If you want more than he is willing to give, you may have to leave him to know his true feelings. Before you leave, communicate your expectations. If he can not commit, your separation may be permanent and you are probably better off without him.


Answer by  Zoe (2369)

You will have to talk to him about this. Ask him why he fears commitment and whether or not he sincerely wants to change. Identifying the cause will help a lot but of course he has to want to change for anything to improve.


Answer by  JenniferJ (326)

He needs to see a therapist and get help. The therapist will help determine if there is some underlying depression and/or anxiety underlying this phobia. Depression and anxiety are treatable if your boyfriend is willing to do some work on himself. This might involve medication but also some cognitive and behavioral work.


Answer by  brett29 (467)

There is no such thing as commitment phobia hes just nervous and scared that does not make a phobia. You just have to reassure him.


Answer by  Zoe (2369)

Does he truly want to commit to you but just feel afraid or is he just unwilling to commit? I think it's important to find out which it is. If he genuinely wants to change, you can either work with a counselor or get some self-help books for you two.


Answer by  Baobao (1273)

In general, that is a natural process,eventually people will overcome this difficulty. You can remind him of being a strong man and describe the beautiful future.

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