Question by  Lynore (191)

Can anyone explain to me why it is my husband can not seem to listen to me?

I no longer use real or substitute sugar, just drink water. my husband went to get burgers, I told him to get the drinks for himself (they're included). He comes back with a regular and a diet soda. I asked why he didn't get the drinks for himself, he said he did get a drink for himself. So we poured the diet down the drain. Can anyone explain this.... to... me?


Answer by  RN2be (138)

He probably doesn't think it's important whether or not he gets one or two drinks if in the end they're only going to affect himself. Try asking him to keep something in mind that will have more of a long lasting impact and he might listen to you.

posted by Anonymous
I agree. It's about communication. Don't assume he understands your point of view.  add a comment

Answer by  Anonymous

He probably just wasn't thinking.


Answer by  harry67 (53)

There's a saying, "it's not about the toothpaste" which is used to say that the husband-wife fight over whether to put the cap back on the toothpaste isn't actually about the toothpaste but about respect and other larger issues. Talk to him about the larger, underlying issue.

Reply by harry67 (53):
And to do that, try using this formula, "When you ____, I feel ____, because ____. " Moderators suggest that style of sentence for communicating and resolving conflict. It can't hurt to try!  add a comment
Reply by Lynore (191):
I've tried that. One of the problems is that he thinks I'm a lot smarter then him and everytime I say something he doesn't answer me, he argues with me trying to prove that what I just said was wrong. But it was never a right or wrong issue..... it's.... called.... conversation.  add a comment

Answer by  Doomstoned (1454)

If a husband is regularly nagged, he might be inclined to drown out virtually everything the nagger says in order to avoid becoming annoyed or aggravated.

Reply by Lynore (191):
what if it is the husband who does the nagging? I can't stand nagging, don't do it, and don't like it being done to me. That is why I asked the question here, I didn't even want to bring it up with him, just wanted to understand it.  add a comment
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